“HOME” WORK DOESN’T END AT RETIREMENT

Is living in a 55+ community for you?  My husband and I have been living in Heritage Point, an age restricted community for seniors 55 and over for over three years and it has certainly been a learning—not to mention--living experience.  Like many things in life, we learned the hard way what to look for and what to avoid.  A lot of the stress and angst we experienced could have been avoided if we had done some “home” work.  Here are some hints to make your task of finding the “perfect” retirement home a little easier.

Sit down with your spouse/significant other and get honest with each other. Just because you have been married for a kizillion years, doesn’t mean you want the same things when you retire. If you don’t address these issues before you move, trust me, they will be raised after. The most important things you should consider are:

• Location, location, location.  Seashore or mountains, city or country?  The setting of your retirement home is directly proportional to adjustment to your surroundings.  And, yes, there will be an adjustment period for both of you.  If your mate hates the heat and you love it, it might be wise to find a temperate climate that suits both of you.  If the beach beckons one but not the other, perhaps a home located inland about an hour from the beach, might satisfy the beach bum and the landlubber.  Don’t think that you will “adjust” after the move.  People don’t change that much—especially after 55!
• Right sizing. People talk about “sizing down” after retirement but that should not always be the case.  I like to think of this move as “right” sizing.   Most couples are going to find themselves together more than they ever were before.  If you revel in “alone” time, make sure that your retirement nest has a special place just for you.  It can be a sunroom, screened in porch or bedroom that is “off limits” to the other.  Remember, “togetherness” goes just so far and falling all over each other 24/7, is not going to be conducive to peace and serenity.  You waited to retire to “pursue that hobby” and “write that novel.”   If that is a priority for you, as it was for Virginia Woolf, make sure you have a “room of your own.” 
• Penny wise, pound foolish.  Retirement communities offer a dazzling array of amenities from indoor/outdoor pools, grandiose clubhouses and 18 hole golf courses.  If you don’t swim or golf, but enjoy a dip in the pool in the summertime, you will probably be quite happy with a smaller community that offers a smaller clubhouse and outdoor pool.  Why pay for services that you will never use.  Common area amenities such as an indoor pool will directly impact the amount you pay in your maintenance.  In addition, you are much more likely to find residents you have a lot in common with when the amenities suit your lifestyle.  If you hate golf and your neighbors are always lounging on the links, you could feel out of the loop.  And, as we get older, isolation is not a good thing.
• The quality, not the longevity, of one's life is what is important-- Martin Luther King.  When I made the decision to move to a 55+ community, some of my friends were aghast.  They made remarks like, “Everyone in those places dies.”  A lot of my friends (mostly women) in the scant three years I have lived in Heritage Point, have lost a spouse, but I have not seen one of them move away.  In fact, the support and love received from neighbors and friends is overwhelming. (See my article “Beloved Men, Strong Women”).   Their women friends encourage them to take community trips and join committee.  There are a lot of retired men are just aching to get their hands on some tools and fix things for others.  The beauty of this premise is they are reaping the benefits of keeping busy and helping out someone else in need.  One male resident here at Heritage Point, said “…he spent years before retirement ‘searching’ for fulfillment.”  When he started Helping Hands, a community committee that does everything from take a resident to the doctor to inviting them over for Thanksgiving dinner, he feels he finally has accomplished that goal.   So don’t let death and dying be the reason you deprive yourself of having a “life.”  I truly believe death will find you quicker in a sedentary, isolated environment outside this type of community than within it.
• Doctors, Dentists, Hospitals, Cardiac rehabs, oh my!   When we first started to look for an adult community, I was concerned as to the location of health care professionals in my area.  Let’s face it, we’re not getting any younger.  One state we looked in was Delaware because of, well, you guessed it, the taxes!  I happened to ask the sales agent where the major hospitals were and she very calmly said they had the very best of facilities and there was no problem getting “air-lifted” to them.  That might be fine for the patient, but let’s face it, someone is going to have to drive there.  Do some research and find out where the hospitals are and how far it is to the nearest “good” one. Get recommendations from your existing health care professionals and ask their opinion as to doctors/dentists in your new area.  Isn’t that what they are always telling us on TV:  “Ask your doctor.”
• Driving Miss Daisy.  It always comes as a shock to me when I find out that someone does not drive.  Not to be sexist, but it is usually a woman. What happens if (when) he passes away…let’s face it, ladies, the majority of us outlive our men.  If this is the case, a community that offers transportation is a must.  If not the community itself, many municipalities have senior transportation services available.  The wonderful thing about adult community living is that most residents are more than happy to run an errand for a neighbor.  However, in order to be as independent as possible in our senior years, this is an important issue to consider before buying into such a community—especially couples whose children live a distance or couples who do not have children.
• “Well, if there aint' going to be any rules, let's get the fight started. Someone count. 1,2,3 go.” – Butch Cassidy.  All age restricted communities are governed by what is termed “The Public Offering Statement” or POS for short.  This is the community’s bible of sorts.  It tells you what you are allowed to do to the exterior of your home and what is allowed in the common elements (the part owned by all the residents).  This is the single, most important thing you need to look at before you buy.  The POS must be given to you at the time of the signing of the contract.  If it is not, ASK for it.  You are entitled to your own copy.  This is the time your contract goes to your attorney to review and make any changes you wish to make. We are not lawyers, however we do know how to read and my suggestion is READ THE POS!!!  If there are rules in it that are too restrictive for you (or not restrictive enough),  do not buy into the community. 
  
  Another suggestion I have is before you buy into a community, find out from the sales office when the Homeowners Association holds their regular monthly meetings.  They are open to the public, not just to the residents of the community.  Attend one or two and see how the residents and Board of Trustees conduct themselves and interact.  These meetings are the place to find out what gripes the residents have, how your money is being spent, what issues are front and center and how the elected Board responds to resident concerns.li>
• Something old, something new.  New construction vs. resale.  Right now we are in an Active Adult construction boom.  New communities are popping up like daffodils at spring time, with a myriad of price ranges.  I bought new at Heritage Point and, although it was fun to have everything “brand spanking new” for the first time in a home, I would not do it again.  Construction quality is not what it was in our younger years.  Everything is mass produced and unlike the old saying, with new homes,  the quality goes in after the name goes on.  And those warranties that last ten years are fine as long as you understand that it covers only major structural problems.  Most of the items you have a problem with after closing, remain just that—your problem.   All developers are busy selling the next home, or getting ready to leave.  A resale that is two or three years old is the best of both worlds.  The immediate issues have been addressed by the prior owner and the ten year warranty is transferable.  In addition, you are getting the best value for your money.  Decorations, wall coverings and floors can always be changed to suit your taste.  Use of outside contractors, most times will give you a much better quality product than if you bought new and upgraded with the developer. 
• If in doubt, rent!  If, after you have done all your “home” work and still cannot decide if this type of community is for you, go to the sales office (if it is a new community) or to a realtor and find out what rentals are available.  This is a terrific way to become familiar with the community and the people who reside in it.  Most rental conditions are controlled by the POS (there’s that rule book again!) and have a minimum rental—usually 6 months or one year.   Whatever the minimum, take it and try it on for size.  It’s a lot easier to move out of a rental home than to sell.  A lot of times, a landlord in this type of situation, will allow a rental with option to buy.  This is the best of both worlds.  If you decide you love the community and the house you rent, a portion of the rental could be used toward the purchase price.  If this is a new community, you also have the added benefit of the “kinks” in new construction being the problem of the landlord.  In any event, renting a home in an active adult community is an “escape clause” worth looking into.

In summary, I must add that active adult living has fulfilled all of my expectations. I wanted to get involved in community activities, lead a healthier lifestyle by exercising and utilizing clubhouse amenities and interacting with people my own age. I just hope that by reading this, I have helped you with your “home” work. I wish you many years of happiness and health in your retirement years, wherever you should decide to retire.